Thursday, August 12, 2010

SABC board summoned to parliament to explain chaos

The entire board of the state-owned SABC has been ordered to appear before parliament's watchdog committee.

Ismail Vadi, chairman of parliament's portfolio committee on communications, has summoned the entire board of the SABC to explain what he called "an apparent corporate governance crisis".

He said in a statement the board, which was appointed in January with a mandate to bring order to the chaotic management of the state broadcaster, would be asked to explain the bungled appointment of a new head of news and current affairs.

Board chairman Ben Ngubane
has been at loggerheads with his colleagues over his unilateral appointment in May of SABC veteran newsman Phil Molefe to the position.

The rest of the board declared the appointment, which was sanctioned by SABC chief executive officer Solly Mokoetle, unlawful, but have been unable to dislodge Molefe.

Vadi said the board would need also to report at the August 24 meeting on its turnaround strategy for the organisation.

Turn-around-strategy? OLOL...I'm rolling on the floor with tears in my baby blues! When are they ever going to get it right? I'll tell you when: Never.

Stories like this give me much mirth and I'd like to present the recycled and appended SABC dictionary....Just for a laff.

Arwa – Collective. Eg, Zuma is arwa esteemed leeda.
Beds - mossies, doves, sea-gulls etc
Beg - container, as in shopping beg, hend-beg.
Ben - to set alight
Betta – I feel betta after voting for ANC.
Brocan – After I drop the cup on the floor (see also Eskom)
Cheelruns - our future is in their hands
Chetz - where worshippers go on Sundays
Cuds - you can play poker or rummy with them
Cut - a small donkey-drawn vehicle
Debben - city in KwaZulu Natal
Deekshunry - where you find weds
Dees – Demonstrative pronoun - eg Dees flowa is preety
Detty - opposite of clean
Drivah - holds the steering wheel of a teksi
Duck - very duck at night when the lights are all off
Eet-Weks – After white repairman has visited Eskom substation
Ebon - you get ebon erriors and rural erriors
Effrican - from the continent of Africa
Erriors - districts, e.g. ebon erriors
Erection – A make of mobile phone
Eskom – eet is brocan
Ewways - eg. SAA, Comair, Lufthansa etc
Feather - Cape Town is feather than Johannesburg
Fems - companies, e.g., Anglo-American
Fest - the one before second and third
Fok - used with nifes to eat.
Fum - you can fum with ship or kettle
Fumma - he owns the fum (diminutive Boer n)
Guddin - where you grow kebbijees
Geev - you MUST gev, I WEEL take
Get - a hinged device in a fence
Glus – Dangerous and sharp when brocan.
Hair - as opposed to heem
Heppi - state of elatement, e.g. I'm so heppi - I just voted
Hiss - masculine form of hairs
Hubba - where sheeps dock
Incest – We demund and incest on expressing arwa rights
Ingaij – Bi-lateral negotiations
Jems - little bugs that give you the flu
Kah - what you drive around in
Kebbijees – vegetable
Kennel - Army officer
Keptown - some think parliament doesn't belong there
Kettegry - in a system of classification
Kipper - one who kips, as in goal kipper
Kleenix - where nesses wek and sick peepul get betta.
Kot - where the judges sit
Len - to acquire knowledge
Leeda - as in Arwa Leeda, JZ the president
Lungwich - weds what are spokkin
Nesses - they wek in kleenix and hosspeetals

Parrot - Illegal/ mimic/ copy/
Pee pull – Collective - Powa to da pee pull
Peppa - one way to get the news (soon to be phased out)
Pesson - one of pee pull
Pees - symbolised by white dove
Pees-Tocks – As in Middle East negotiations
Reeva - e.g. Limpopo, Vaal, Orange
Rejeem - anything to describe pre-1994
Reekwest - replaced by deemunds
Sefty glus – Not dangerous in kuhs when brocan into
Selulah – A mobile telephonic device
Sheep - big boat
Shex - (PL) houses in squatter camps
Ship – Animal that provides wool, keeps you warm in the shek
Shuck-attak – Happens if the shuck-net is brocan
Shuck-nets - at Debben, for safety of sweemas
Spitch - what politicians make at a relly
Suffa-Ring - as in “the pee-pull are suffa-ring”
Sweemas - compete in a sweeming pull
Tekkie – The bed in the oven to celebrate Jesus’ bethday
Teksi - kah for hire - sometimes parrot teksi
Tex - Reperations for apartheid paid by whites
Thesty - ice cold Coke will relieve it on a hot day
Tipic ally - characteristically
Tocks - negotiations
Ummy - military force
Verrr – To an extreme – The reeva was flowing verrr fast
Weel – Expression of powa eg Wekkas weel unite against the oppressor
Weemen - ladies
Weepon - a gun
Weendo - with glus for throwing bricks through
Weena - the one with the most votes
Weds - what the dickshunry is made up of
Wek – Productivity -eg. I wekked verr hud dees week
Wekkas – Wekkas do the wek, wekkas always strike.
Weld - the whole eth
Wems – Bait for fishing

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