Monday, December 28, 2009

It is the end of another tax year un the USA. (humour)

Just in Case You are a Senior and Get a Check for $250...

By end of this year, we seniors will again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting program.

I'll explain it using the Q and A format:
------------ --------- ---------

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?

A. From taxpayers..

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of Asia ?

A. Shut up or you don't get your check.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your money will go to China .

2. If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to Saudi Arabia .

3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .

4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras or Guatemala .

5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea .

6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to Taiwan .

7. If you pay off your credit cards, or buy stock, it will go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in offshore accounts.

Or, you can keep the money in America by:

1. spending it at yard sales or flea markets, or

2. going to baseball or football games, or

3. hiring prostitutes, or

4. buying cheap beer or

5. getting tattoos.

These are the only wholly-American- owned businesses still operating in the US .


The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day until you're drunk enough to go get tattooed.

3 Opinion(s):

Anonymous said...

Sounds like SA

Anonymous said...

I know this was meant to be funny. At this time we are at war with the people who want to destroy our country,culture and race. There are many American made items you just have to put a little effort into looking for them.Remember when you buy cheap crap from China you are buying bullets to kill your children or grandchildren.
Cracker Americanus

Viking said...

I tend to agree with you, anon., maybe except for the bullets part - rather when you buy cheap crap from China you'll have to buy it again in two weeks once it breaks. They are getting more sophisticated, but look what that did to Japan and Korea, where it is now as expensive to produce anything as it is in America. China doesn't have that problem because they have an endless supply of cheap labour.
Balanced trade with China is the only solution - make them buy stuff other than Government bonds.