Tuesday, September 29, 2009

The Malema Virus

By Wayne G (News24 User)

Malema: the worst virus since HIV


The "Malema" virus is spreading fast and infecting the airwaves; it is airborne and seems to be more prevalent amongst the impressionable youth at the moment, but may change with the wind. It is believed the ANC hold the vaccine, but for some reason they are not using it. Their ignorance is allowing this virus to mutate rapidly and infect our society. The destructive capacity of a virus often depends on how it is dealt with upon detection. If quarantined in time, its effects can be minimised.

Let's dissect the virus:


By giving the Malema virus human characteristics it will help us understand its traits. Malema, the man child pathogen who barely passed at school is living it up like a rock star on his mere R20 000 a month salary. He seems to think he is someone special, someone given a mandate to speak his mind. The Malema virus is a highly infectious pathogen mutating into a harmful corrupting agent hell bent on causing anarchy and revolution and using the ANC as its host to launch its assault.

Symptoms:

Symptoms of this virus include hate speech, confusion, dementia, bigotry, opulence, ignorance, memory loss, delusions of grandeur, weight gain and racism. If you have any of the above symptoms please report to your nearest healthcare professional, there is no known cure, but we need to treat the symptoms aggressively and symptomatically.

Case Study:

According to a popular Saturday newspaper the Malema virus currently resides in Sandown estate in Sandton, one of the plushest suburbs in South Africa, drives a black C63 Mercedes AMG worth R800 000 and has been rumoured to drive an Aston Martin and a Range Rover. For a staunch critic of the "white man" he surely enjoys driving their European designed cars, wearing their Gucci suits, this hypocrisy goes to show his public hate and criticism is just a fa├žade and he actually likes white people and their inventions and creations. His life style depicts this; with his being photographed in top restaurants and bars drinking French champagne with his friends who are also highly infected with the virus.

His delusions of grandeur don't end with his love for worldly possessions but he believes his important viral vessel needs to enjoy 24 hour body guards, what on earth for? He is Julius Malema, the man that could fight any threat off with a single thought; the explosion of such an event will render any attack futile. He has been called everything from "Silly ass" to "Zuma's little fat Goebbels" and doesn't seem to let the constant criticism get him down, this could also be an indication of infection. This virus is highly resistant to the current treatment which seems to be making it stronger. He is like Samson in many ways, except he does not draw his strength from his hair, but rather from the air in his head.

Like many viruses he is his own worst enemy, and often becomes its own demise. In his short time on the scene he embarrassed himself so many times in public that he received huge amounts of media exposure. His controversial comments didn't sit well with a lot of South Africans and he was lambasted by the media. Malema used this negative publicity as a portal for his viral marketing and campaigning and quickly realised that there is no such thing as negative publicity. Every time we heard him speak, we listened in awe to each fumbled word as the saliva sprayed forth like a summer Highveld cloud burst.

This virus has infected other leaders with disastrous ramifications. Many dictators in Africa have risen to prominence through similar tactics and cheap politicking deployed by Malema. It is dangerous, and should be nipped in the bud while he is still the laughing stock of most educated people. He is like a dung beetle, he has started rolling a small amount of excrement around but as this excrement gets bigger, it gains more momentum and is harder to stop. It preys on the desperation of poor uneducated people.

Malama is an embarrassing product of the ANC's 16 year rule; he is a mutation of all that is negative and embarrassing for South Africa on the international stage. Friends of mine in Europe, Australia and Canada truly cannot understand why we are letting this virus continue untreated. A half wit allowed so much political freedom to express his clear prejudices and narrow minded ideals reeks of something that is not under control.

Way forward


The ANC need to take responsibility for such rogue pathogens and pull them into their ranks and inject them with some rationality, dignity and other human qualities that have been destroyed by the infestation. Our constitution and related laws are in place to stop this buffoon from airing his controversial thoughts and polluting our democracy.

As seen lately, Malema is becoming accustomed to the inside of a court room, a sign that this virus is slowly being neutralised. Let's cure this ugly disease once and for all and take a step forward to a unified healthy country, free of bigots who have way too much freedom and influence on our impressionable youth.

Ending off with the wise words of Glen Morris "Diseases are caused by viruses and bacteria. If the body doesn't happen to have those viruses or bacteria, then the risk is less."

As South Africans, we need to rid our land of such threats to our democracy; they serve no other purpose other than chaos and international embarrassment.

4 Opinion(s):

Viking said...

R20,000 a month??
You're kidding. How does he have two cars and two houses on that salary? Not that he deserves that much at all, but wtf?

Treacle Bender said...

"Malama is an embarrassing product of the ANC's 16 year rule;"..

the anc is an embarrassing product of the ANC's 16 year rule (sic)..

boons doing what boons do best...being boons..

Treacle Bender said...

@ Viking...that's easy..you'll probably find out that our very articulate youth-boon threatened and refused to pay any imperialist racist company for any rent or car lease..

Anonymous said...

I wonder if the highly efficient South African Revenue Service has bothered to look into this.

Are those investigations merely for us lesser (white) mortals?