Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Duties Of Wives

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.





Terry had married a woman from Greece. He bragged that he had told his wife she needed to do all the dishes and housework. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.






Jimmie had married a woman from Italy He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. He told them that the first day he didn't see any results, but the next day it was better. By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.









The third man had married a South African girl.

He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, laundry and ironing twice a week, lawns mowed, windows cleaned and hot meals on the table for every meal.

He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, just enough to fix himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher, and call a handyman.

14 Opinion(s):

Doberman said...

My wife is one of these. Is it just me or are South African women just the most beautiful in the world - in general? I can tell you Aussie women wouldn't make the grade. Not nice to look at. I have to fly back to SA just to give my eyes a rest.

Vanilla Ice said...

I agree with you Dobes. South African women are relatively gorgeous. I think it is because they are proud to be women, and they make an effort. I look at some of the Canadian women by contrast and I wonder how they managed to procreate. Perhaps that is why the white race is on the decline ... in general of course.

Doberman said...

Yep, looking at some of the inbred fuglies walking around here, I wonder, not even 12 beers, a case of Red Bull and 100 Viagra could get it going. In my neck of the woods, it is mullet haven. And that's the chicks! Tattoos, piercings (not attractive girls!), red/black/blonde dyed hair all-in-one (could never understand that), gothic dress etc. Not much to want to shag there. So much so, the previous Aus govt started to give couples $4000 per child in order to raise the birthrate. For $4000, yeah, I s'pose.. Anyway, the mutts hit the sack and the birthrate climbed. Yeesh. There should be a law, no ugly people may procreate ;)

FishEagle said...

You made me dress up today, you buggers. High heels on the run is a bitch!

Dachshund said...

Remember that scene from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert? An ugly Oz broad insults Terence Stamp playing a drag queen. Without missing a beat or blinking an eyelid, he replies, "Why don't you light a tampon and blow up your box, cos that's the only bang you'll ever get."

Andrea Murrhteyn said...

Comment for Patriot Husbands (if there are any on this blog! ;-))

I guess it depends what you call 'ugly'. Personally when it comes to whom should, or should not be allowed to procreate; I think that since we all need a licence for a gun, a licence to drive a car, a licence to build a house, a licence to practice 'entrepreneurialship', etc... we should be required to get a licence to procreate.

So, in that light; considering that all social problems, from 'racism', to 'crime' to 'war' and a bunch in between, are the result of overpopulation colliding with scarce or finite resources; we should use one of those socialist hammers and bang some go**am sense into the moronic imbecile proles.

The need a licence to breed, they need to know what loving procreation is about, it is not just about spreading legs, pumping and dumping, shagging and popping out unwanted and hated babies. That is what REPTILES do, whose only concept about childrearing is done in their REPTILIAN brains. So, until any two legged reptile can demonstrate that he has done his or her homework and learnt how limbic and neocortex brain's procreate, he can remain without his licence to procreate; the penalty for violating, being that he is castrated.

As said by: ~ U.S. Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes; Jacobson v. Massachusetts, 197 U.S. 11; Buck v. Bell 274 U.S. 200 (1927) ~ and referred to in State v. Johnstone: HC-CPD Appeal A 696-04, which Judge Hlope and the NPA refuse to place on the roll for hearing in the High Court:

“…all society rests on the death of men. If you don’t kill ’em one way you kill ’em another — or prevent their being born...

We have seen more than once that the public welfare may call upon the best citizens for their lives. It would be strange if it could not call upon those who already sap the strength of the State for these lesser sacrifices, often not felt to be such by those concerned, in order to prevent our being swamped with incompetence. It is better for all the world, if instead of waiting to execute degenerate offspring for crime, or to let them starve for their imbecility, society can prevent those who are manifestly unfit from continuing their kind. The principle that sustains compulsory vaccination is broad enough to cover cutting the Fallopian tubes. Three generations of imbeciles is enough.”


Lara

PS: My personal ideological political preferences are Austrian School, Gold Bug, libertarian of the Wild Bill Hickock variety; but unfortunately I live in a country of ignorant moronic socialists; so I am forced to apply thier 'licence' logic to problem solving. I prefer real truth education; instead of this Stalinesque Brave New World Orwellian Double Speak BS, but anyway]

Leifur said...

You know though that generally strong willed women and societies where women can hold their own against their men generally don´t procreate as much as societies where they are subjugated to the whims of the husband. Just look at the difference between feminist Europe and muslim countries. I wonder if it isn´t the same difference between the society of whites and black in SA and that maybe is the reason of your current debacle. Hopefully there can be some balance as I wan´t our society to continue for centuries to come but not to cowed women.

Best wishes,

Leifur

Anonymous said...

These jokes just don't work with "South Africa"!
I mean, who are you talking about when you say "South African Woman"?

If by SA Woman you mean an Nguni Woman, well they do EVERYTHING anyway, while the men do NOTHING!
If you mean a Sotho Woman, well they do EVERYTHING around the house while the men sometimes help with the livestock (something Nguni men would never do as it's small boys work)!
If you mean a Boer Woman, they do everything around the house and cooking but nothing outside it (fair enough)
If you mean a so-called Anglo-African (not all English-speaking women), then YES, I could see how your joke would work, maybe with the Indo-african women too, but generally a tiny percentage of SA's women!

Maybe now people will realise just why SA is such a mess. Multi-culti doesn't work!

Anonymous said...

@Andrea. What's "loving" got to do with it?

Andrea Murrhteyn said...

Anonymous (30 April 2009 01:49)

Sorry, not sure how to interpret your question.

@Andrea. What's "loving" got to do with it?What is 'it'? Is 'it' sex, procreation, marriage, dischordian poker; or what?

Cause otherwise I may go on a mental masturbation mindf**k bender (MMMB), answering my interpretation to your question; thinking myself so wonderful to be at your service (ha, ha!) and it may not be at all related to your intention and meaning with your question.

And then finally I will find myself, with a Nauri Island Dead-mans-hand, like the USS Monte Elephant Christo, off the coast of Newfoundland, in October 1995: If so, are you a Russian Poincare Mounty Lighthouse? [See what I mean by MMMB?]

Lara

FishEagle said...

Lara, agreed. People should get a liscence before having kids. Voting too!

Anonymous said...

Lara said: "Sorry, not sure how to interpret your question."

That's my point exactly Lara: very few people in the West actually think for themselves; they've been fed so much shit that jokes like this (imagining ALL SA Women can be bracketed in ONE culture) make NO SENSE (nonsense); people actually believe that Nations are determined by the false borders created by the "League of Nations"...

hence my rhetorical question!

I'm trying to "teach (people) to fish, rather than feeding them for a day!

PLEASE USE YOUR COMMON SENSE PEOPLE: THERE IS NO SUCH NATION AS "SOUTH AFRICAN" - IT IS A CHAOS OF MANY NATIONS THROWN TOGETHER FOR THE FINANCIAL BENEFIT OF THOSE ABROAD!

Vanilla Ice said...

@Anon 07:01 and others. The ability to appreciate humour does not exclude all the valid arguments put forward by others. It merely suspends those arguments temporarily, like appreciating a sound bite in isolation. I am not about to debate what constitutes a nation or who should be qualified to procreate, at least not here and not now. To first consider every argument every time before having a laugh is the beginnings of the slippery slope to political correctness. No thanks.

Did you hear the joke about Van Der Merwe, the Irishman and the Jew? Well .........

Anonymous said...

"Did you hear the joke about Van Der Merwe, the Irishman and the Jew? Well ........."

"Irishmen" and "Jew" describe two nations, so the joke would work (you could generalise about them). "Van" describes some characteristics of the Boer Nation...

You've only highlighted my point:
NO SUCH THING AS S'AFRICAN WOMEN!