JOHANNESBURG. South Africa's cohort of murderers has sent the Israeli military a telegram of congratulation for managing to kill 1,000 people in twenty days, the same rate at which murders occur in South Africa.
In the telegram the murderers hailed a "really decent effort" but warned Israel that if it wanted to compete it would need to sustain the killing all year.
Israel has been killing people at a rate of 50 per day in Gaza since its incursion began three weeks ago, and this morning South Africa's murderers said that the Israelis had done "very well" to edge ahead of South Africa's official murder rate of 49.3 people per day.
However they agreed that beginner's luck was 
a factor. "Yes, they've got that extra 0.7 on us at the moment," said murderer spokesman Slang Booi.
"But let's see if they can sustain it for the rest of the year." He said they had sent the telegram of congratulation "because everybody is always breaking down the self-esteem of murderers, and we need to stick together".
But he warned that Israel was making basic errors. "The whole point of murdering, apart from killing people, is to stay out of the spotlight so you can keep on murdering," he said, adding that Israel was showing "considerable naivety" by using air strikes and artillery in Gaza.
"That just riles people up," said Booi, adding that if South Africa's murderers had also been using helicopter gunships the country "probably wouldn't have got the 2010 Soccer World Cup". "I mean, you wouldn't hold the World Cup in Gaza right now, would you? And yet we've got the same body count as them.
But the big difference is we use axes and rusty 9-mils. They use white phosphorus." He said that the other major mistake Israel was making was that it had killed men.
"That's a no-no. If you really want to stay under the radar like us, you've got to kill women. "Wives, girlfriends, sisters, sisters' daughters. Politicians have shown they don't really care if women get killed. "So from our side, from one 50-a-day bro to another, we would urge them to dig deep, give 110 percent, lay off the men, and learn how to swing an axe."
MAJOR GAY WOW FACTOR! YOKO ONO UNVEILS HORRIBLE CLOTHING LINE!
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AWD was at the Byron Nelson golf tournament today with the filly. It was
her first time ever seeing a golf tournament and we got some free tickets.
It was ...
45 minutes ago
7 Opinion(s):
Gees, that does put things in a different perspective.
Of course in Gaza the whole world is up in arms demanding ceasefires , sanctions and commissions. In the utopia of a rainbow nation however, no one gives a crap about the victims.
An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly and made the world community smile.
A representative from Israel began: 'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about Moses.
When he struck the rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath!'
He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water.
When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Palestinian had stolen them.'
The Palestinian representative jumped up furiously and shouted, 'What are you talking about? The Palestinians weren't there then.'
The Israeli representative smiled and said, 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech TF
Hilarious..... Anon
Tremendous parody of a frightening situation - for South Africans - I could give a toss for Palestinians.
Where the South Africans beat the Israelis hands down is the costs per kill ratio! That's productivity !
Poor,and uniformed analogy to use Israel as the "Bad Guy" Now, on the other hand if you had used hamas, the ismalites version of a sewer rat, and it's flawless use of kids, women, elderly as shields (youtube et al)your point would have been more poignant and had more impact.As they, hamas and the 'pinkfoot' have much in common when it comes to this type of cowardly warfare.They, both hamas/pinkfoot just luv the weak and sickly to prey on.Relish the thought of instant gratification. Have still yet to find a Israeli suicide bomber, young or old.
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